Thankful

You know what I'm thankful for? I can't believe how many smart, funny, and talented people are in my life. I have been preposterously blessed to know so many artisans, artists and intellectuals...I am a home grown small town kinda girl and it blows my mind that I was able to meet you folks and hold you dear. I am not worthy.

E*'s STUNNING book about my brother in law reminded me of this today. I thought about his experiences and her skill in showcasing them, which made me think about the good fortune I have in knowing both of them.

I thought about people I know that have excellent writing and musical abilities, ones with bananas decorating prowess, ones that paint freakishly well, ones that should have their food featured in Bon Appetit, ones that have slick business skills and savvy that belies their years and experience (I am leaving attributes out, I know I am, because it would be impossible not to. I won't list any more names, because leaving out a set of initials and a talent would be sacrilege).

I am so lucky to be able to hear all of your travel, work, family, life stories first hand and absorb what you have gained and lost through them.

Thanks for doing all the stuff you do, going all the places you go, and sharing what you share. My mind and heart are full because of it.

p.s.

Even when you're stark raving mad, any and all of you, doing the most crazy ass, stupid sh*t...it's pretty interesting. Thanks for making the world fascinating. You inspire me.

Is This a New Post? Seriously?

Wow, I suck @ blogging. I'm renaming my blog "Suck @ Blogging," actually. And why am I presently writing? Well, because I have a LOT of other things to do, obviously! That's how I roll. I just make up additional tasks to avoid the current ones.

So...today I'll be talking about me, as usual, and these are the things that I am thinking of directly from the top of my head:

1. I've decided that I need to retire by about 50 or 55. The thing is, I need to have a second career. I figure if I have about 20 years to do that before my mind really hits the skids, I should be ok. I think my second career is writing, but I might be a liason for contractors and builders or own a shop. Isn't it terrible that I'm plotting a second career when the first one hasn't even gotten off of the ground yet?

2. I discovered yoga. Isn't it annoying when people find out about something that you've known about FOREVER and then they act like it's a new thing? This is what I am doing. Since I have now taken four weeks of kettlebells and kundalini, I pretty much invented them. And this stuff is better than the wheel. Should you like to join me when you are in town, see The Center.

3. I'm moving to the UK. I don't know when. Probably never. I've gone and hampered myself with children and a husband, so the timeline on this is highly questionable. The following are the reasons that my mind is moving to England: Jane Austen, Shakespeare, Chaucer, a monarchy, Kate Middleton, Harry Potter, Tudor style, X factor, Cher Lloyd and Cheryl Cole, Top Shop, All Saints, the British pound, stupid phrasing like calling things "blooming" or "bloody" or "brilliant," and WAGs. Plus, in Britain, I would have an accent.

4. On NYE this year, TJ and I will be attending Cirque de la Symphonie. I think this is hilarious. He does not. I'm an old bag, though, and I'd rather watch grown up Ice Capades* than go to a raging bash. I'm searching for meaning in this.

5. That's it. People keep calling me and interrupting my flow. I hope you all have a good day. Should anyone ever read this, feel free to post any random thoughts about yourselves that you'd like to since I've wasted so much of your time in this fashion.

*editing credit: Leeanne P.-S.

Bucket List, Phase 1

I am a bucket list kind of girl. The following items need to be finished up before my 40th birthday. A very few have been completed (you will see the date/place next to the item). I'd best get to it.

1. knit something
2. go to Egypt
3. get a BS
4. get a Master’s
5. take an art history class
6. be licensed for Real Estate
7. sew on a button
8. parasail
9. zipline
10. drive a boat
11. whale watch
12. deep sea fish
13. Morocco!
14. read 100 classics
15. be married!
16. go to an NFL game (Vikings! 1/4/10)
17. go to an opera in Prague
18. baseball game @ Wrigley field (...no game: tour Oct 2010...)
19. take my kids on a trip
20. go tropical with my husband
21. have house at least 2/3 pd off
22. stop chewing gum (i think i can check this...MAR 2012)
23. get a promotion (or 5)
24. run 5 miles
25. go to salem (Oct 2010)
26. go to England
27. go on safari
28. go see E & E! wherever they be (SWITZERLAND 2010)
29. learn how to garden
30. write a letter and mail it
31. write a song
32. publish a letter to the editor
33. ride in a hot air balloon (Cappadocia, Turkey 2011)
34. inca trail
35. white water raft
36. go to Antarctica
37. ride in a helicopter
38. bake a pie
39. ride a camel (DUBAI 2009)
40. volunteer (2009, 2010, more to come...)
41. learn a 2nd language
42. do jury duty!
43. write my will
44. stop sharing too much
45. stop sharing other ppl’s stuff too much
46. take yoga class (NOV 2010)
47. ride a bike again
48. start a business
49. have board game nite regularly with my kids
50. have a spa sleepover with my kids
51. swim with penguins @ the Galapagos islands
52. haggle (1/10/11 NYC)
53. go to a high school reunion (July 2011)
54. be free of credit debt
55. pay off student loans
56. quit smoking (attempt #50..1/1/11...)
57. learn to belly dance
58. try to surf hahahahaaha
59. figure out my beliefs
60. see the rainforest
61. see the desert (DUBAI 2009)
62. see the taj mahal
63. skip down the great wall of china
64. see Pompeii
65. learn how to back comb
66. spend a whole day at the Louvre
67. eat caviar
68. eat an oyster
69. eat healthier
70. see a broadway play
71. picnic in central park
72. own the alma
73. cruise the nile
74. go to a hindu temple
75. attend synagogue
76. visit a mosque (DUBAI 2009)
77. tour eastern and central Europe
78. fly business class overseas (DUBAI 2009)
79. learn how to order sushi (ATL 2010)
80. take a cooking class
81. camp with my family
82. have 8 mos. expenses in acct
83. save index funds/CDs for my kids
84. make sure my babies understand value
85. sleep in a castle
86. have fiscally responsible children
87. go sailing
88. go lobstering
89. go to Disneyworld!
90. walk on a glacier
91. dogsled
92. use my mixer (all year, and it was amazing!! 2011)
93. make one good dish my family loves
94. send tj to the Stanley cup
95. trek Nepal
96. learn the basics of Wicca
97. figure out what Mormons believe
98. get reflexology
99. get acupuncture
100. do a cleanse
101. learn how to make potica
102. have a meaningful conversation with my grama
103. celebrate my 30th birthday someplace amazing!!
104. go to an ashram in India
105. run a ½ marathon
106. be enlightened
107. see SNL tape
108. go to a game @ Target Field
109. watch Kasey Jo graduate
110. go to Ireland with my husband

Do you have a bucket list? What's on it? Any tips on fulfilling this stuff?

Boom! Ice broken.

Another ice breaking post...I refuse to be intimidated by the length of time that lapses between one post to the next. Refuse.

These are the things I need you to know from this silent time we've had:

I am not painfully thin, yet. And God is still hiding from me. I'm flirting with becoming a Muslim. Non-practicing, of course. I can't devote time to real religion.

Wicked is the best thing ever. People are saying this all the time, I know, but you should start believing them. My girly friend, BKJ, and I went two weekends ago. My mind was blown by the wonderfulness. The music, the plotline, the pace, the costumes, the actors, the theater (the Orpheum, Mpls)...amazing.



The Dead Sea Scrolls exhibit at the MN Science Museum is good, but I liked the IMAX about "Arabia" even better. Both of items make me pine for the middle east, anyway.

The Saint John's Bible was on display at the museum, as well...I didn't think I would find this interesting, but it was completely gorgeous.

KCjo is in public school now. It's ok...minus the flannel pant wearing 300 lb. moms with suckers and friends at orientation. (?) WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY


Baby E looks a lot like Whitney Houston's stalker in The Bodyguard these days. Crazy eyes, crazier hair.

I am going to watch T's band play tonight in St. Paul at Station 4. There will be a bus and a lot of beer. I'm very nervous. I'm not very good at drinking beer all day. Especially after book club night. Uffda. He is excited, though, and it should be fun anyway.

Till next time.

Cheese and Life

I bought good cheese yesterday. Double cream Brie and a Goat. I also made the mistake of getting a milkman last week, who brought butter and milk from the farm. This led to me to making Cheddar Basil Scones. So today I ate all of these things and a truly great chicken breast sandwich with the last of the Gorgonzola. Then I made the kids Mac and Cheese, at which time I ate at least two helpings of that. I also had a Nutty Bar and Doritos and Hot Tamales. I topped off the day with a Coke since it's 2:30 and I can't take any of this gorging back.

The thing about all this food talk is that I'm a terribly gluttonous human. If I let myself slip (i.e. good cheese and fresh milk), I fall off of the mountain, wagon, whatever (see the Doritos, Nutty Bar, Coke). In addition to my eating habits, this is how I roll in relation to school, shopping, my makeup, reading, etc. Pretty much anything with the exception of cleaning. SO.

Tomorrow (always tomorrow) I will be trying to etch some positive obsessions into the grain of my life. Like working out (I was good! For a whole 2 weeks in May). And I think I'm going to just quit eating food and stick to KB's Master Cleanse recommendation. Cleanses are tricky for hypoglycemics, but I could possibly find God this way, too, since I hallucinate after about 6 hours without food.

The next time I write, I'll be painfully thin and spiritually evolved. People will be stopping me in the street to address my gaunt appearance and miraculous inner light. Yes, they will probably think that I have a life-threatening disease, but I think I can solve that with wardrobing.

Here's to quitting cheese and looking fabulous(ly sick).

Obsessed: Vacation Planning

I'm a sick vacation planner. Sick. I find myself planning a vacation today for the month of October. It involves Boston, Salem, and Boothbay Harbor, ME. I am nuts about hotels, airline routings, stuff to do, how I will ever get my jogging stroller planeside checked, food we will purchase, packing lists...I think I plan for as long as I am gone, generally. Maybe even longer. It's 1/2 the fun.

The most fun of this 1/2 of the fun is my activity list...Salem is high on my to-do list, and I am really, really excited about the prospect of Nathaniel Hawthorne's house (oh, I'm sure my family will be thrilled) and the House of Seven Gables. I also have a Hocus Pocus Tour on the agenda and Count Orlok's Nightmare Gallery, which will probably make KCjo cry, but looks too cool to miss. We will definitely see the cemetary and all the good witch stuff and buy overpriced Wiccan goods.

I am hoping to do a freedom trail tour in Boston and go on the lobster boat in Maine. Can I fit rubber boots in my carry on?

Stay tuned.

In the meantime, I appreciate any advice you have for Boston (places to go? To eat?), travelling with kids (esp. a one year old---AUGH! Jill B-should you come back, you must have something on this! Kael went to Africa for God's sake, right?!), packing, activity planning...

I Loathe You, Independence Day

I have a tremendous bone to pick with the 4th of July. When I was 17ish (meaning 13 to 19), I remember the 4th of July being all about boating with your best buds and people you didn't know, getting sloshed, trying to waterski, sneaking into the Riv and getting kicked out and soldiering that party through every Independence Day T-storm and on into the night.

Then I grew up, and the 4th of July reared its ugly, patriotic head.

We still go out to the lake every year with the delusions of our youth building the excitement to parade time. Then I get to the parade, and I realize that I am suddenly saddled with children and the desire not to look like a drunk a**hole in public. I have to reckon with the loss of my bikini body, and the knowledge that even if it showed up tomorrow, I'm too old to wear outrageous swimwear on the parade route. Then I see 16 year old tramps living the dream. Laughing and swearing, drinking and smoking...

Tomorrow is D-Day, once again. Tomorrow I will live through another holiday that lost its sacred status so many years ago (7). I will dream about the time when this once special day can return to its former glory...when my children will finally be away from me and old enough to be doing things that I don't want to know about. I will again have a selfish, wild, ridiculous 4th of July. Someday.

Trading Up

Yeah, so I missed a day or two. I retract my earlier decision about direction, and I am sick of the word direction, so let's just forget about it for awhile.

I looked at the stocks that I look at every couple of months since they are all on sale again. Per my spreadsheet, when I started looking @ AAPL (hey, I have an ipod and i really want a macbook...and that is EXACTLY the sort of logic I use when I look at stocks...please never, ever look for reason beyond the fluffiest fluff when I refer to the NYSE, my retirement account, or any other "investment" I have; the stock market is like my own personal Monopoly, and what I mean by that is that I take it as seriously as I took a childhood board game that I sucked at) it was at $89.32 per share (12/28/2008) and today it was at $257.08/share. WTF, world? (No, that's not a ticker, stop googling it). I want to have dolla dolla bills, y'all; let me play!

I also missed the boat on SFLY. I talked myself out of that one since my reasoning was shaky even for me ("OHMIGOD! You can order and edit pictures online and use coupon codes? Cute logo! I should give them money!"), but it was $7.14 and is presently $24.49. I like to see multipliers used when checking growth. 3x is a good one. I like those silly long shots that have nothing to do with solid histories or excellent balance sheets. Everyone teased me about that Ford (F), but it quadrupled since then, which constitutes success for my brand of trading.

Sooo...want to pretend trade? Try the Virtual Stock Exchange. It's fun.

If I had some cash today, though, I would buy me some XOM. Why? I don't know. Because they just picked up an energy company. Because even though BP is on clearance, I know St. Peter is shutting me out if I buy it. Because I think it will go higher than the $57.24 of today. Of course, I get C's in math (maybe). I just make up stories and buy stuff. I'm like Freakonomics but dumber. Unfortunately for this analogy, that guy had coherent ideas.

When I really do buy (and sell, and dream about understanding options), I use TradeKing. It's cheap ($5 per trade) and easy to use. There is lots of cool info on the site. They have seminars and scoreboards, etc. It's a great place to go if you're too embarrassed to tell an actual broker that you want to buy JCrew (JCG) because you would take a bullet for their driving mocs (guilty).

Later, my 7 gators.

Really, K? You Missed a Day ALREADY??

To be fair to myself, I was under duress. I mean, looming interviews pretty much make life obsolete. I needed time to focus on how unfocused I was. Which brings me to:

It went OK. Just OK. I thought there were going to be all these technical questions, so I kept waiting for them...and then there weren't. I didn't elaborate on what I should have because I was saving the big guns (i.e. lengthy answers) for voltage questions or pressure problems with over-tightened houses or how many pascals to calibrate a blower door to. So, I kind of sucked, and they only asked me about stuff I should have RULED at. Ridic. Fortunately, I don't actually hate my job or anything drastic, so I'm not exactly wounded over not being at the top of my game. Disappointed in myself, but I'm not crying. Or drinking.

What I did do this evening in lieu of crying/drinking: got a spray tan with S.M. in Grand Rapids. I don't know where you are, but it's raining here. Good thing I wore a sundress and she wore booty shorts. Spray tans + Rain drops = Cheetahs. In a weak attempt at to prevent morphing into another species, we tore garbage bags open and wore them home.

Then we realized we couldn't unroll the windows in the car without rain dripping in. Ordering at Caribou was a debacle of Guantanamo Bay proportions. Since I needed Darjeeling tea, it was a treat to watch S.M. try to articulate that through a one inch crack in her window. The end of that was kind of like this: "WHAT THE (bad word) DOES SHE THINK I'M SAYING??? DOES SOMETHING ELSE IN THE WORLD SOUND LIKE DARJEELING?"

We lived through that. We had another minor incident @ her dad's house when S.M. rolled down my window to yell to her pops while I screamed "SHUT MY WINDOW?? WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" like a banshee. Nothing like spotty broads screaming at each other in a car. Welcome to Keewatin.

In the end, we won't know if we are girls or wild cats until tomorrow. I'll let you know.

*p.s.
a really great pic of S.M. and myself wearing garbage bags exists, and I am unhappy right now that I know that I would be skinned alive and said skin would be sold to Cruella DeVille or a devout Michael Jackson fan should I post it. Sadface.

BLOOOOOOG

I didn't forget you. 11:58 P.M. A was just here prepping me for my interview. With Mich Golden Light. And Marbs. Wish me luck.

xoxoxo

Direction??? and a shower.

I've been thinking (this never bodes well; you should be wary, now, and any time in the future that I use this phrase). I neeeed a direction. All these lovely blogs I've been reading always have a direction. So, I am considering having an EVERY SINGLE DAY blog blog. This gives me license to have absolutely NO direction while pretending that I do. I am also picturing being at one with my challenge...like hiking towards a signal (OH! WELL, THEN...I suppose this gives me license to need an iphone...in time for the new version. hmmm) because I'm on a mountain, camping (...).

Let's work with it.

Alice in Wonderland "the shower" was this past weekend. It was totally wonderful. It was intimate and comfortable and sweet. The decor was DIVINE (shoutout: SAMANTHA MOBERG...and a tip for my readers, both of them: should you need a party/wedding/house decorated, call this b*tch and hire her out. she loves it. it's weird and sick and AMAZING because she's soooo good).

I am waiting for the pics (taken by SUZY WIGSTADT) and will post at least the link to them later. Go to her link!! Her kiddie pics are to die for! (ok, they're all pretty fab ;) Suzy brought a cake that looked like one of those ridic reality tv cake decorating show cakes and cupcakes that were so adorbs it almost wasn't right.

**these are my pics, they don't do anything justice...but they can serve as a teaser for Suzy's :)


Check out the invitation (RENEE ANDERSON @ Express Print in Hibbing):


She also did the sickest signage and had a whole collection of vintage hats to be used with the decor...talk about stellar ladies to work with!

Mama Lizzy and baby Tessa were much loved by their lady friends on Saturday.

Then I got the flu. And lost two pounds. A very productive weekend, indeed.

Sell Hard: the K Ren Story

What is it about a job interview? It's the scariest situation that isn't actually life and death or sickness or health (or apparently, marriage vows?). I think about interviewing and I feel like I'm going to throw up. On myself. My hands get clammy and shake. My voice gets weird. It's so awkward to sit in front of someone(s) and sell your virtues and camouflage your flaws. Underselling is a no go, but selling too hard is worse. Sell juuuust hard enough. Also, seeming natural and calm is of the utmost importance, because you really don't want the interviewer(s) to be uncomfortable. That's your bag. Upchuck in it if you must.

These days you really have to have an arsenal of stories ready, too. It's always "Tell me about a situation in which..." What happened to the good old days of "What are your strengths? What are your weaknesses?" That stuff you can prepare ahead of time and be safe (i.e. "Strengths? I'm a team player...Weaknesses? I forget to look out for myself because I'm such a team player." har he har har). Now you had better write a book about your life as a worker beforehand so you have ready material. Now the idiot with the big fish stories is a sought after commodity in the job market.

I have this interview (no! you don't say...). My qualifications are negotiable. Feel free to send me tips. Or any fishing stories you can part with. I will be planning to Sell Hard: the K Ren Story in the mean time.

Stayin' Strong...Day 2: Post 2

I'm keeping myself in check tonight by starting a post (with nothing in my mind)...I now know that I have had 2 readers!! Holler, Toni L & Tara O :) I love that you have visited, even if you never do again.

I am in the throes of baby shower planning today (which will occur this Saturday for my friend Liz)...it is "Alice in Wonderland" themed and my go-to color pro just stopped by to panic me about my palette. I am not allowed to be using the bright red rose garlands with the tea sets I've selected...oy vey. T minus 5 days, get it together, Kristin! I will be cleaning (and crying) and gardening (and crying) and decorating (and crying) till then. I'll try to post pictures if it comes out like I intend, and I'll pretend it never happened if it doesn't.

Since my blog is completely directionless and entirely selfish at this time, I thought I'd share weird things that I like when I think of them. Today I am sharing a clothing line I adore: ALLSAINTS Spitalfields. I can't handle the coolness, really. Which is fortunate, since I can't afford to be that cool, either. Someday, though, it will be mine, oh yes, it will be mine:
Anyway, I think it is English, and they are opening a store in Boston, which I'm so fricking excited about (TJ's fam in Maine is about 3 hours from BOS).

Please note: I just made a link. That's a major coup in my blogging life.

Short and sweet for today, peeps. My husband looks really tired and obviously wants to rub my back (HA!).

Well, HELLO THERE!

I have just discovered that I can no longer use my facebook profile as a blog. What is this garbage?? Facebook, for god's sake, people want you to invade their privacy! They wouldn't be social networking otherwise. They want you to know that they are poor and getting divorced and that they have illegitimate children and have been feeling ill for days...I know because they, themselves elected to fill that information in that little status box. Anyway, I will maybe have to blog now...maybe.

I am at present drinking coffee, which makes me sick, and listening to torch songs on Pandora and reading an '09 issue of Harper's Bazaar that I keep in my desk. I am also making up stories in my head about imaginary people and am terribly pleased to have the solitude that this Saturday brings in which I may do that.


My last post mentions Dubai, which was marvelous beyond marvelous. Nothing will ever be as romantic to me as Arabic and Islam and desert. {That was one s, not two; I'm not terribly fond of sweets.} I hope I can go back someday...I am dreaming about exploring Morocco, too, where I'm being denied a vacation this year (I'm poor: see? I wanted you to know) even though a close, familial girlfriend will be there for months.


I also visited Switzerland last month to see my dear, dear sister and brother. I ate the most wonderful cheese and Elisabeth cut up a radish at one point, which we just...ate. I love travel eating. We had many nice conversations, many ridiculous conversations, and Erin and I also had many, many drinks. We sat in a park with real wine glasses until my fingers froze and eventually went to a club that was possibly a bunker (or, in my stupor, sure looked like one). In time, we ended the morning drinking Chartreuse (I think it was actually liquified pleutonium) whilst watching Tupac videos.

I have suddenly run short of (pertinent) thoughts. My mind is making fiction again. I think it best that I leave the ice to my blog broken and return to Wikipedia. Among other gems of useless knowledge, I've read about the making of "The Way We Were," Truman Capote (did you know he was childhood friends with Harper Lee? I did not.), Anais Nin, and The Cotton Club.